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Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:01PM

Apparently there are some very dangerous cockroaches lurking in the Playa Blanca area.

Victims injuries include suspected groin injuries and scabby knees.

Warning : do not approach them or try to catch them and definitely DON´T chase them into the nearest pool.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!


(For those of you that actually believe all you read on this board........
This is a joke)

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:16PM

Needless to say... Alan now has a beautiful big scab on his knee!

And as for "the other guy"... hmmm.... that'll be ME that dealt with him then!



A Police Report has been filed in "Missing Persons"... but somehow I don't think they'll find the culprit! winking smiley

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:20PM

tongue sticking out smileytongue sticking out smileytongue sticking out smileytongue sticking out smileytongue sticking out smiley

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:27PM

At least we know it is only a little graze now and he won´t be able to make out he nearly broke his leg.................(think "Man Flu", girls)

Alan, ain´t you got hairy legs?? And they look ginger!!!!

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:30PM

Elle

Ain´t you cleaned that black spot off your lens yet ? LOL

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:43PM

Lol Lynne! You're absolutely right!

OK... have now taken phone to pieces... attacked it with a cotton bud.... cleaned it inside and out. Grrr... it's still there. Grrr!

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 11, 2007 11:57PM

Alan,

We were only going out to get you a REALLY nice Valentines Day gift but, seeing that you deliberately impeded our girlie day out, you´ll have to make do with nowt.
Oh except you can have a large raspberry from me which is rather like the colour of your insy winsy little graze. LOL

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 12:40AM

You're supposed to put the alcohol on the graze not down your throat LOL.

No probs about the day out, we´ll do it again and we might bring you back some nice Argyle socks and sandals to go with your hairy legs, Ginge.

Seriously though, that looks quite nasty. Bet it stings. But as my Mum used to say

"It will be a pigs foot in the morning" (don´t ask me what that means)

Lynne

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 12, 2007 01:03AM

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Lynne love... he's shut his laptop down for the evening... but his reply was (oh god.. I know this'll bring more laughs lol)

"I don't want Argyle socks... I want a support bandage!"

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 01:05AM

I have just shown Steve the picture and he says....I quote

" Wow, that looks really serious and it definitely warrants a fortnights bed rest, bed baths and oodles of sympathy. The day should start with a cooked breakfast in bed (to get your strength back) and a constant supply of tea, whilst reading the daily newspapers which have been purchased by "her indoors". As the day progresses the tea should be filtered out and the alcohol re introduced. For lunch, consume a lightly boiled egg with toast soldiers or, if preferred, a boiled egg and bread mashed up in a cup.
A good few hours siesta in the afternoon will aid the healing process as will the copious amount of wine all served by Elle dressed in your favourite French maids outfit.
To avoid straining the vocal cords, have a little brass bell to hand so you can call Elle every 5 minutes to fetch and carry some irrelevant article that you couldn´t possibly reach yourself.
You must have sole use of the remote control as watching ONLY what you want to watch will aid recovery (but NOT before the two weeks is up).

I really feel sorry for you mate, I can imagine the horrendous pain you must be in. That has definitely bruised the bone, if not chipped it, and I´m not sure if you shouldn´t visit the A&E as they may think a long spell in hospital is in order.

You have my heartfelt sympathy
Steve"

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Sorry, I was just removing my fingers from down my throat!!

Lynne


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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 12, 2007 01:14AM

Okay... response from Alan... "I like this guy... but he missed out the other 'add-ons'" winking smiley

Response from Elle " be afraid, Steve... be very afraid! I'm gunning for you now chick" tongue sticking out smiley

Alan's also just said "God this hurts... and I'm sure that it would hurt a lot more without the alcohol!"

Bless him!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/12/2007 01:16AM by Elle1971.

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 01:21AM

I think an early night is in order for him Elle. You´ll have to rig up some sort of cage though to keep the bedclothes off his leg............

Can´t have the poorly soldier losing any sleep now, can we.

I know........

Put guido´s dog cage at the foot of the bed and he can put his leg in that!!

Lol

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 01:22AM

You´ve got to take a photo of that though if you do!!

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 12, 2007 02:08AM

Dog cage? For Guido? Nooooooo! He's far too much of a good boy for that!

He sleeps in the living room, and secures the perimetres for us lol.

As for Alan... methinks he'll kick the covers off anyway. Not that I'll notice - I'll be far too asleep to notice!

Nunitey hon!
xxx

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 02:24PM

So, how is it today Alan?

Does it look anything like a pigs foot?

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 12, 2007 03:49PM

Aren´t you following Steve´s advice and getting plenty of bed rest?

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 17, 2007 10:28PM

Now behave yourself Alan and don´t go chasing anymore of these little blighters tomorrow.
Wrap yourself in cotton wool.......better still don´t get out of bed at all. Can´t have you messing up two Monday´s in a row!!!

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Elle1971 ()
Date: February 17, 2007 10:47PM

Absolutely right Lynne! I'm really looking forward to Monday. Shall we say same time and place as was agreed last time?

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 17, 2007 11:06PM

Yes, i think so...........can´t remember what we said though LOL (and I´m sober!!)

Sent you a PM

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Re: Killer cockroaches
Posted by: Lynne ()
Date: February 17, 2007 11:16PM

And, under the circumstances, I think Alan should "cough up" for our lunch as well.

Take note Alan, all traces of sympathy are now completely out of the window, the poorly soldier is no more!!!!!!!!

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